Live the #LovePowerLife
I've been a big dreamer all my life. I remember being lost in a daydream for hours in the middle of playing by myself before my sister Teyonna was born. I'd daydream about my pink mansion with rooms for everything; a music room, an art room, a zoo room, a movie room, a garden room and any other room you could think about. I'd dream of road trips cross-country and living in an RV. I was OBSESSED with RVs. I'd dream about them at night, spaz out when I saw one going down the road and play pretend acting like I was going to see the geysers at Yellowstone or the Grand Canyon. I wanted to live by the beach and surf all day, despite never having swam a day in my life. That was my dream.
I would also daydream about cruising the streets and going to the drive-in or sitting under the stars in a pink Cadillac convertible with the roof peeled back. My dad had a gorgeous green Seville with these glittery flecks that looked like fairy dust shimmering in the St. Louis sun. I ADORED that car and hoped he'd save it for me when I turned 16. Yeah right. My Daddy loved to buy, sell and trade cars like kids did with baseball cards. I got an old beat up Chevy instead that I was terrified to drive because the floor had rusted out on the passenger side and I was too afraid I'd lose my purse on the highway! Talk about a Flinstones-mobile! More like a death trap! It was one of his "project" cars and I guess he figured since I didn't really know how to drive this would be the perfect car to wreck. Good one dad.
Despite not getting that pink drop-top Caddy I still obsessed and dreamed of convertibles. Longing to feel free with the wind in my hair tucked under a sheer scarf donning a pair of Jackie O glasses as the sun kissed my forehead, those thoughts were always in the back of my mind along with my other obsession (no, not pink;))-RVs. Living, working and playing out of some type of RV was the dream. A home on wheels! Whether it be a trailer hitched to the back of a 1950's Chevy convertible or just a typical motor-home, those free-wheeling adventures swarmed constantly in my mind.
I can truly say that I'm a testament to the power of dreaming. When I've put my mind to it I've manifested quite a few of my dreams. As I'd gotten older, the need for everything to be pink faded, and I realized that I don't need or want the responsibility or commitment of a mansion and all those rooms and STUFF! Time and experience helped me to really understand myself and my needs, that to some which may seem like desires. I discovered that as much as I like stuff (particularity beautiful, quality stuff) I don't want to be burdened with the worry of what I'm going to do with all that stuff when I just want to pick up and leave. I've been downsizing my life since my ex-husband and I separated and divorced when I decided that I was going to find a way to buy an RV so that I could live, work and play out of that bad boy. Take my show on the road. Sell my wares. Meet people. Have adventure. The only problem was that I didn't have $95k for the many well-equipped, used RVs I'd looked at. My prayer to God was to help me to find a RV I could afford and with no job, living with my dad, in the midst of divorce and failing health, I was looking at $0.
When I first moved back to St. Louis in 2011, I'd mentioned to my dad my dream of the RV life and he told me he had a friend, Bill that was selling for $900. I'd almost lost my mind because I'd gotten super clear on the year, make and model of the one I wanted (86'-88' Class C Chevy) . I was even clear on the color (beige or white with light blue/green interior)--thanks to the power of Google images. He took me to see it and I swiftly started filming the experience on my phone. On the spot I named her Sunni because she was a Sunseeker like me! I manifested this RV in my life- at a price that I could afford. No, I didn't have $900 right then, hell, I didn't have two pennies to rub together, but I knew I could get $900 quicker than $95,000 based on my employable skills and a few weeks time. I told Bill not to sell my RV and that I'd be back. He lived just across the perpendicular street from our kitchen window and every morning when I came downstairs to make my morning smoothies I stare out the window, gazing upon Sunni, dreaming of road trips on the fly. I'd do that several times a day and watch the video I made over and over again. I would show it to everyone-- even people I'd just met. I knew it was mine. I just needed the money.
I found a part-time job at the front desk of a massage place and immediately opened a savings account at the bank a few doors down from my job. That $50 I started my account with stayed there for a couple months and never grew. I was making pennies and had bills to pay so I could never add more to it. My dad told me Bill lowered the price to $500 and I vowed to myself that I would get that RV on payday even if all I had was $500 and couldn't by food. I meant it. It was time for my baby to come home.
Friday morning came and I could not wait! I called one of my dearest friends, Enoch, in Atlanta to tell him the news. To my utter dismay as I'd turned the corner coming down the stairwell into the kitchen, my mirthful spirit was quickly quelled at the sight of three men inspecting my Sunni! I shrieked! Enoch asked what was wrong and I whined as I gave him a play by play of what I saw. He said, with the tone like your mama would give you when she ain't playing, "you betta go get yo shit". I hung up that phone so quick and went and got dressed. I marched down the alley leading to Bill's backyard like Miss Sophia on the way to Celie's on The Color Purple. There was gonna be trouble and I was ready.
By the time I'd made it to Bill's, the men had gone and I had tried calling my dad a million times but couldn't reach him. I confronted him about letting those men look at my RV. I mean, how dare he?? He said he hadn't heard from me and figured I didn't want it. I told him it was because I didn't have all the money and didn't want to keep bugging him about it until I did. I told him to call the guys and let them know that it's not for sale because I've got the money and planned to buy it today- I'm just waiting on my dad to get home to take me to pick it up.
Then he proceeds to tell me that he can't do that because he promised those guys. "What about my promise Bill?" I asked, "I thought you said you would sell it to me?" "I did, suga, but like I said..." At this point I was trying to hear any of that. So I start to beg. He doesn't budge. Then he mentions that he offered to make a trade with my dad for his red pick-up. "And what did he say?" I asked. "He told me no." I couldn't believe it! I felt like I had been betrayed. My dad he knew how much I wanted this RV how much it meant to me and he wouldn't trade a measly truck for my happiness?
Defeated, I slowly walked down the alleyway kicking rocks, wiping tears from my eyes feeling like the karate kid after those guys jumped him. I was all messed up in the heart and in the head. I went upstairs to my room and cried my eyes out as I talked to Enoch. He tried to comfort me but nothing worked. I was so close. I knew it was mine. How could this happen? I wasn't quite ready to give up, so when I saw the guys pull up again and I marched over there to have a word with them. Now this guy looks at me smacking his lips as I tell him that this is my dream and that he cannot buy my RV. He chuckles and tells me I can ride with him. Psst! Yeah right. He's over here flirting and I'm serious as hell. I walk away once again from my rout, head hanging low, this time sobbing. As I walk towards the house my dad pulls up. He asked what's wrong and I tell him the whole story. Then I tell him about the trade. He says, "aww he wasn't serious". "Yes he was!" I yell as I stomp up the stairs to grab my bag for work. Now, usually my dad takes me to the train but this time I was fuming and didn't want to be in the same space as him. I angrily march to the MetroLink and understandably do not get harassed by a single guy.
As soon as I walk into work my phone rings. It's my dad. He says Bill will sell me the RV for $500 if I have the money today. I tell my dad to come get the money and to "have my RV in the backyard when I get home". Spoken with disdain as any spoiled Daddy's Girl would in a similar situation. Not very nice I know, especially to my dad but I was all up in my feelings. When I got home that night Sunni was halfway in the backyard being put into her parking space where she'd sit for year or so. Although she was running, she wasn't in the best shape; dry rot tires, leaks and sat up for a while prior to purchase, so there were some unknowns. I had all the plans in the world to fix her up and take her on the road but my health and finances were not going along with the plan. I eventually sold her for the same price I bought her for to be a blessing to someone else and used the money to buy my first old skool convertible Lili. Since then, I've bought another newer (hardtop) convertible. I put the top down every chance I get and go to RV shows and dealerships in search of my new baby.
I'm in the process of manifesting the perfect camper van for me. One that is easier to maintain with more accessible features to accommodate my arthritis. I plan to live in it full-time and use it to tour my one woman shows, spoken word, and youth theater projects. It's on it's way. I know it. I am a believer in my dreams and I will make them all come true just like I have in the past.
What dreams do you have? No dream is to be too small to come true. You can have anything and everything in this world your heart desires. Leave a comment below. I'd love to hear about them.
Spread Love. Be Love. Live a #LovePowerLife
Ever since I was young, I wanted to make a difference in the world. As an activist at heart and a flower child of sorts, my mom would constantly ask me "where did you come from?"-haha! Now that I'm older I have a clear understanding and I'm confident to say that I come from LOVE.